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When I was young I wanted Taco Bell ALL THE TIME, but I couldn't afford it.

When I was in college I got a low paying job. Taco Bell was all I could afford so I had to eat it all the time.

Now I am older. The amount of Taco Bell I can afford is measured in feet. But I can't eat it because then my waist would be measured in feet...

Posted from Carrboro, NC

Posted from Carrboro, NC

You can call me a fat, balding, talentless old queen who can't sing – but you can't tell lies about me.

-Elton John after winning a libel case against The Sun ->

Posted from Carrboro, NC

But I really want a color laser printer with duplexer for my birthday...

via Nick Holmes... on 1/20/10